


Fake It 'Til You Make It

by AnonDude



Series: JayDick works [28]
Category: DCU, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Boys In Love, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Pining, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:47:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28490055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonDude/pseuds/AnonDude
Summary: Dick convinces Jay to fake-date him to get Babs off his back. It doesn't stay so fake.
Relationships: Dick Grayson/Jason Todd
Series: JayDick works [28]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1875007
Comments: 15
Kudos: 184





	Fake It 'Til You Make It

Jason was just getting ready to go out on patrol when there was an urgent tapping on his bedroom window and he looked out to see Dick on his fire escape.

He opened his window and let him in. "What do you want?"

"Jason I need your help." Dick had never looked so serious and frantic, and Jason had to admit he was a little weirded out.

"What for?" He asked carefully.

Dick grimaced. "Babs asked me out and I freaked out and I accidentally blurted out that I was already dating someone and if she finds out I lied to her she'll kill me."

Jason raised his eyebrows. "And what do you want _me_ to do about that, boy blunder?"

Dick closed his eyes and rushed out the words so quickly it took Jason a second to process them. "She asked who it was and for some reason you were the only name that popped into my head."

Jason blinked at him for a moment and then laughed. "No."

Dick peeked one eye open. "Please?"

"I'm _not_ fake-dating you just because you lied to Barb, Dick. Be a big boy and own up to it." Pretending to date Dick was the _last_ thing Jason needed. It would be too damn close to the real thing and it would feel cruel to not quite be able to have what he secretly wanted so bad. Dick was always already being dangled in front of him, a reminder of what he'd never be good enough to have.

Dick gave him some absolutely _killer_ puppy eyes and grabbed one of his hands in both of his. "I'll owe you one, Jay — _anything_. Please. I'll pay for our dates and I'll make sure it doesn't take up too much time and I promise you'll have a good time; we just gotta do it for a couple weeks to make sure she's not suspicious and then we can break up."

Jason… Oh Jason fucking _hated_ that he didn't know how to say no to Dick.

He let Dick wait for a few moments before he finally said, "Fine."

Dick gave him a dazzling smile and Jason felt his heart melt a little. Oh he was so fucked.

"Awesome!" And then Dick was fucking _hugging_ him, because Dick was...Dick.

Jason let him and sighed heavily, trying to ignore how fucking good Dick smelled. (Was he wearing cologne? Why the hell would he be wearing cologne?) "So, what exactly am I gonna have to do for this whole charade?"

Dick pulled back, still smiling, and bounced slightly on his toes. "Oh it's gonna be easy peasy, we'll just have to go on a few dates and we should both stay at one or the other of our places most nights probably. But I'll work around your schedule and I can come over here if it's easier for you."

Oh yeah, Jason was _fucked_.

<<•>>

Dick caught up with him around three in the morning. "So are we going back to yours?"

Jason glanced at the CCTV camera pointed at them and nodded. "You're sleeping on the couch, loverboy," he said, taking full advantage of the fact that he could say whatever the fuck he wanted in his helmet without Barbara reading his lips.

Dick just smiled sunnily at him.

When they got back to Jason's place, Jason took his helmet and jacket off, taking his guns out of their holsters. "Don't touch anything," he said, grabbing some sleep clothes from his dresser and then heading to the shower.

When he finally came out, Dick was sitting on the window sill on his phone. "Hey, can I borrow some clothes?" He asked, looking up as Jason came back into the room.

"Sure, knock yourself out." Jason put his uniform away, then flopped down on his bed. "Get the lights on your way out."

Dick quickly grabbed some clothes from the dresser and left the room, flipping off the light. "Night, Jay." He shut the door.

Jason wriggled under his covers and tried not to listen to the shower running and think about Dick naked in his bathroom, and eventually he drifted off.

<<•>>

Dick stumbled into his kitchen when Jason was halfway through making breakfast.

"Coffee?" He asked, looking adorably rumpled, the collar of Jason's shirt he was wearing skewed and showing his collarbone and the top of one shoulder. The shirt and boxers were both too big on him and Jason had to turn away to hide his smile because he was really fucking cute like that and a tiny bit ridiculous.

"Got some around here somewhere, you can make it." Jason already had his tea and he wasn't gonna make coffee just for Dick — Dick could figure out his coffee machine.

Dick yawned and stepped forward, starting to look through the cupboards. He found the coffee and filters in the cabinet above the toaster and took them over to the coffee machine on the opposite counter, and then set about figuring out how to work it.

Jason divided the scrambled eggs evenly onto two plates and put a few sausages in the pan and looked back at Dick, who was now leaning against the counter watching the coffee machine as it rumbled. The pose happened to give Jason a fantastic view of his ass and it was possible he stared a little bit before remembering he was supposed to be watching the stove.

Jason finished cooking the sausages and buttered the toast and brought both plates out to the table as Dick finally poured himself a cup of coffee.

"Thanks," he said, sliding into his seat, clutching his mug in both hands and taking a sip.

Jason gave a grunt of acknowledgement and went to go grab his tea.

"So, I was thinking for our date today—"

Jason held up a hand. "Not today. Looks kinda suspicious if we go on a date the day right after. Wait 'til tomorrow."

Dick rolled his eyes. "If we're dating, it shouldn't matter when, but okay. Tomorrow. We should go to that new Greek place." He took a bite of his food.

Jason shrugged. "Sure. When?"

"For dinner. Seven thirty?"

Jason nodded. "Are you staying over again tonight?"

Dick took a bite of his toast. "Mhm."

<<•>>

"How exactly is a date different than normal dinner?" Jason asked around a bite of his gyro.

"Oh jeez, my condolences to anyone you've ever dated."

"I've never dated anyone, dumbass."

Dick looked shocked. "Wait, really?"

"Nobody I fucked around with was exactly the romancing type."

Dick sat back. "You can't call me a dumbass when we're on a date, for a start." He ignored Jason rolling his eyes. "But now I feel bad for _you_. You've never been wooed? I'm going to woo you."

Jason gave him an annoyed look. "Please don't." Christ, that was the last thing he needed.

"You can't stop me. You deserve to be properly wooed once in your life."

"I've still got plenty of time."

Dick widened his eyes innocently. "We could all die at any time, Jason. Life is a gift."

Jason snorted. "You are so full of shit." He supposed in their line of work the risk was higher, but he didn't plan on dying for a second time anytime soon. "And I don't want your pity wooing," he added.

Dick leaned forward, eyes still wide and earnest. "It's not just pity, you're very woo-able. Practically begging for it, really with that face."

Jason blinked. Oh. "You've started already, haven't you?"

Dick hid his smile behind his gyro. "I'll never tell."

Oh great. So Dick was going to kill Jason now. Slowly and painfully via flirting. Awesome.

Why did Jason agree to this shit again?

<<•>>

It had been two weeks now, and they'd been on two dates. The wooing was simultaneously not as bad as he thought it would be and much worse.

"You like Shakespeare, right?" Dick asked, over dinner.

Jason narrowed his eyes at him.

"I was looking at the bookshelf in your bedroom while you were in the shower a couple days ago," Dick explained, like that was completely normal.

"I told you not to touch my stuff."

"And I didn't touch it!"

Jason sighed. Dick knew full well what he meant.

" _So_ , my point is, they're doing The Taming Of The Shrew at the theatre this week and we should go tomorrow for the matinee so we don't have to worry about getting out to nighttime activities on time."

"Fine."

Dick pressed his lips together. "Aren't you at least a _little bit_ excited?"

"Sure," Jason said with absolutely no inflection, taking another bite of his food.

"You make wooing very difficult," Dick muttered under his breath

"Probably because I don't _want_ to be wooed. As I've said. But hey, you can think of it as a chance to brush up on your romance skills."

"Just let people be _nice_ to you!"

"Pass."

Dick set his face. "I'm _gonna_ woo you. Just you wait."

Jason side-eyed him and Dick deflated with a sigh.

"The show's at three. Wear something nice."

<<•>>

Jason actually enjoyed the show a lot, despite the show of unenthusiasm he'd put in before, and was in a good mood when they stepped out of the theater.

"So I'll be back by before patrol, I've just gotta pick up a few more things from my place," Dick said.

Jason nodded, and then made a surprised noise, hands instinctively grabbing Dick's upper arms as Dick leaned up and kissed him.

"Holy shit, Babs is right across the street," Dick murmured against his lips. 

Jason sighed and tried to relax his body. Oh this was _so_ unfair — kissing Dick but not _actually_.

Dick pulled back and smiled at him. "I'll see you soon." He waved and turned away, like he hadn't just turned Jason's entire world on its head, and Jason watched him go for a second before looking across the street. He saw no sign of Barbara. She must've left already.

He headed toward his own motorcycle so he could go home and scream internally and bang his head against the wall for however long it took Dick to get back.

<<•>>

"Shit— _fuck!_ " 

Jason walked back into his bedroom after his shower a few days later to see Dick climbing through the window, swearing.

"You good?"

Dick shut the window and rubbed one side of his back. "Pulled a fucking muscle, my back has been tight as shit lately."

Jason watched him for a second as he gingerly headed across the room and opened the drawer in the dresser that Jason had cleared out for him to put his own clothes in.

"From sleeping on the couch, isn't it?"

Dick grimaced. "Yeah."

Jason watched him for another long moment as he got out clothes, and then let out a long sigh. "Fine."

Dick looked at him questioningly.

"You can sleep in the bed." Ugh, Jason hated himself a little for doing this to himself, especially after Dick had kissed him, but he didn't want Dick to get hurt more than he already was over stupid fucking sleeping arrangements.

"Really?" 

Jason hated himself more for how much he liked the bright smile Dick gave him, but he nodded.

"Awesome!"

When Dick finally climbed into bed with him after his shower, Jason outright despised the part of him that thought he could get used to this.

<<•>>

It was week three and they'd been on five dates so far, and Jason had to say he was really starting to simultaneously hope the end of this farce was coming soon, and hope that maybe it would stretch on a bit longer.

On the one hand, it was kind of torturous having Dick so close, and trying to woo him even if it was just out of pity, and pretending to date him, and sharing his bed. On the other hand, he kind of enjoyed the torture. Dick was pleasant to be around, and he _was_ showing him a good time on his dates as he'd promised, and it was nice getting to know him better. They'd never really _talked_ much, not _significantly_ before, but now they were since they spent almost all their time with each other.

Unfortunately, what this all meant was that instead of just crushing on Dick from afar, Jason was kind of falling in love with him. Which was totally the opposite of what he wanted to be happening and very not cool.

"Hey, Tim's coming over; he thinks he might have some insight on that trafficking ring case," Dick said, not looking up from his phone and taking another spoonful of cereal.

"'Kay."

When Tim arrived, they were both already working on their laptops on the couch. Jason got up to let him in, and they all worked steadily for an hour or so, until the room fell to silence for a few minutes.

"Are...you two...a thing?" Tim asked hesitantly.

"No." Jason snapped, at the same time Dick said, "Yeah, why?"

Tim's eyes widened and he put his hands up in surrender. "I'm _so_ not getting into the middle of that."

Jason glared at Dick. Why the fuck did they have to extend this stupid fake-dating thing to Tim too?

"We _are_ ," Dick said firmly, looking directly into Jason's eyes. Hello, for all they knew Babs had asked Tim to ask, or maybe it would come up in conversation later; they couldn't blow their cover.

"No." Jason said again, with finality.

Dick narrowed his eyes. "You go on dates with your friends? You kiss your friends? You share a bed with your friends?"

Jason narrowed his eyes back, letting them sit in silence for a long moment before replying. "I hate you _so_ much."

Dick gave a satisfied smile. "But I'm right?"

Jason paused. "No," he said stubbornly.

"But I'm _not wrong?_ " Dick prodded.

Jason just glared, and Dick's smile widened.

"I do _not_ understand you two," Tim said, half to himself. And then, to Dick, "You could have, like, _anyone_ , why do you want Jay, when he hates you?"

Jason turned his glare on Tim, his expression promising that he could and would snap him like a twig if he wanted to. The little twerp didn't have to sound like he was convincing Dick that Jason was a shitty option. Jason already knew he wasn't good enough for Dick, but he could at least _pretend_ for however long this thing lasted.

"Just saying!" Tim defended himself. " _You_ said it."

Dick laughed. "He doesn't really, it's how he expresses affection."

"It's really not," Jason said.

Dick just smiled.

Tim looked back and forth between them. "Uh huh. Okay, well let's just...go back to the case."

The next time Tim looked up, they were holding hands, Jason typing one-handed and Dick watching through feeds. God, they were so fucking weird.

<<•>>

Early that morning, when Dick got into bed after his shower after patrol, Jason turned to him. "We need to end this thing, it's been long enough, I can't do this anymore, it's too much."

"What do you mean it's too much?"

Jason flailed his hand. "Bringing Tim into it! Holding hands! Kissing! That right there should've already been too much, I don't know why I let it keep going, it's too damn close."

"Too close?"

Jason flailed his hand again and made a distressed noise.

Dick slowly grabbed his hand and lowered it to the bed between their chests, but didn't let go, his hand warm and heavy over top of Jason's. He looked at Jason for a long minute, a crease between his eyebrows and his detective face on.

"You don't do romance; it lets people too close?"

"No, dumbass; this isn't real romance!"

Dick's detective face stayed on for another long minute before it smoothed out. "You still shouldn't call me a dumbass if we're dating."

"We're not actually dating!"

"We should." Dick said simply, like those two words hadn't flipped Jason's world completely upside down and shook it for loose change.

"What." It came out flat and toneless with his surprise.

"I've liked dating you a lot and I want it to be real, and it sounds like you want that too."

Ooh Jason _hated_ detectives.

"So?" Dick prompted, when he got no response.

"Yeah," Jason said weakly.

"Lit. Can I kiss you?"

Jason huffed out a laugh. "Why do I like you?"

"Because you have good taste?"

Jason leaned forward and kissed him. It was awkward and their noses bumped, but Jason thought it was pretty awesome anyway.

"Does this mean I've successfully wooed you?" Dick asked.

"Fuck."

<<•>>

They were in the Cave sparring one evening as Bruce and Barbara worked together at the bank of computers, and Jason _finally_ managed to take Dick down onto the mats after Dick pinned him four times.

He pulled Dick up to his feet and gave him a quick kiss.

"How did _that_ happen?" Bruce asked, staring over at them.

Jason looked over and smirked, sauntering over closer to them. "Well, when a bat and a bird love each other very much…"

Dick tagged along, following him over toward the computers.

Bruce sighed. "I don't know why I expected an actual answer."

Jason laughed. "Naw, I'm just kidding; Dickie's a coward and I'm an enabler. He lied to Barb and needed my help to get him out of it."

"Jay!" Dick complained, sounding betrayed.

Jason shrugged. "She was gonna find out eventually."

"Wait, what? What did you lie to me about?" Barbara asked.

"He panicked when you asked him out and didn't know how to turn you down nicely so he said we were dating. We were totally not," Jason said.

Barbara frowned. "You could've just said no. I'm a big girl."

"Yeah, well he's an idiot so he didn't and decided we needed to pretend to date to convince you, and I didn't know how to say no."

Barbara blinked. "You didn't need to convince me, I believed you."

"You were watching though! You're Oracle, you have eyes everywhere!" Dick said.

"No," she said slowly. "Why would I want to use that to watch you two go on dates or whatever? I already thought you were dating, I didn't need confirmation."

"But the theater! You were there when we came out of the play!" Dick insisted.

Barbara's brow creased. "I go grocery shopping at the store across from the theater, so yeah, I might've been there."

Jason burst out laughing. "All of that was literally for nothing, oh I'm _never_ gonna let this go."

Dick crossed his arms with a huff. "Well it got you a boyfriend."

Jason came around behind Dick and wrapped his arms around him. "He's a little bit of an idiot though. But I like him anyway."

Dick leaned his head back against his shoulder, turning his face in so his forehead rested against the side of Jason's neck. "You fucking suck at being romantic."

"Who said I was trying, dumbass?"

Dick laughed. "You're still not allowed to call me a dumbass. It's illegal."

"Okay, dumbass." He pressed a kiss to the side of Dick's head.


End file.
